30.9.19. Istanbul felt different and at first more exotic than when I stayed there. We had stayed with a new friend and talked about translating Azimas book into Turkish. And stepped out into the street with new eyes. It felt like vacation still, something new to be explored. We took a taxi to a university cafe where our new friend was going to play tennis close by. Suddenly I couldn´t be in the cafe where we were, had to leave and walk around, the smoke, the music, the impressions were all too much. My body senses it all, not on the outside, but inside – it goes through me. When it is nature, heartenergy and silence it is wonderful and I become more alive. This was not like that, it just brought up so much sadness. I started crying, had to let it through me and my nose and throat was bothered by the cigarette smoke. The sorrow was deep and also touched some of my own sorrow about experiencing these things so intense, that it means I have to leave or say no to situations and events. While I was sitting crying and letting – this sweet dog came to me and put her head on my thigh. She kept on looking at me deeply. If I stopped caressing her she would put her head in my hand. She was the angel of the day. Her name was Leydi. <3 [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]